Welcome to Day 7 of Safe & Sound!

As we dive deeper into internet safety for our second week of Safe & Sound, we’re looking at a danger that’s closer to home. A troubling 47% of young people have been intimidated, threatened, ridiculed, or socially ostracized by people they know.

WE’RE TALKING ABOUT CYBERBULLYING.

Bullying used to happen in school hallways, bathrooms, or on the playground. Now, thanks to cell phones, bullying has entered the digital realm. And that means cyberbullying can happen anywhere: at the dinner table, in a child’s bedroom, in the car, or any other place your child has a device and is actively engaging with the internet. When you’re talking to your kid about cyberbullying, the easiest definition is “bullying that takes place over digital devices.” But there are some additional aspects of cyberbullying that you should know.

It’s persistent, ongoing, and permanent. Unfortunately, a one-off situation does not constitute cyberbullying. There has to be continued harassment. Cyberbullying is permanent because whenever anything is put on the internet, it is there forever.

It can take many forms. Types of bullying or harassment include:

• Pretending to be someone else.

• Excluding someone from a group for no good reason.

• Sharing someone’s personal information.

• Posting rumors, information, or pictures meant to embarrass.

• Forwarding text or pictures meant to be private.

It’s difficult for adults to catch. Cyberbullying happens across multiple platforms, including social media platforms, messaging apps, direct messaging functions, online forums, email, and online gaming communities. Today’s kids tend to have conversations online through their devices. The distance created by the screen can embolden kids to harass others. Kids need to be aware of how their actions online can affect others.

It’s the sign of an unhealthy relationship. On Day 4 of Safe & Sound, we talked about characteristics of healthy and unhealthy relationships. Cyberbullying is full of unhealthy red flags. A cyberbully can deal in betrayal, volatility, belittling, sabotage, and isolation.

HOW TO FIGHT CYBERBULLYING:

There are ways to combat cyberbullying. Having conversations with your child now can help curb the effect cyberbullying has on them later. It all boils down to three steps: Block, Report, and Ignore. Block anyone that is cyberbullying. Report the instance to the platform/app it is happening on. Ignore and don’t respond to any posts. Ignoring online harassment is also the recommended course for anyone who sees it happening. When your child responds to a cyberbullying post, even if it’s to say, “That’s not true,” it ends up spreading that post further. If your child does see cyberbullying happening, encourage them to reach out to the person who is being bullied. Let that person know that not everyone is against them.

Be the parent or caregiver that is open to talking about tough topics. If your child has a question or is facing a difficult issue and you don’t know the answer, be willing to say so—and then follow through and find out the answer with your child. Show your child that they are not alone.

TODAY’S ACTIVITY

It may be easier for your child to consider cyberbullying—and consider what they would do—from a position that is removed. Watch a movie with your child and talk through the discussion questions.

Younger Kids:

Watch the movie, Wonder  (this may take a few days to complete). It is a great example of how someone can make a huge impact on a person’s life who gets bullied.

Wonder Discussion Questions (from Common Sense Media):

1. How do the other kids react to Auggie in Wonder? What do they learn about him over the course of the movie? What do you think you'd do in their position?

2. How does being bullied affect Auggie? How do you feel about Julian at the end of the movie? What role does peer pressure play in some of the bullying? How would you handle the situation that Jack Will faces?

3. How does the story show the importance of empathy and perseverance? Why are those important character strengths?

Tweens and Teens:

Watch the movie, A Girl Like Her  (Trigger warning: there is an attempted suicide.)

A Girl Like Her Discussion Questions (from Common Sense Media)

1. Why is the issue of teen bullying getting addressed more frequently in popular culture? Is bullying as widespread as A Girl Like Her makes it seem? What are ways you can help stand up to bullying? Bullying is often seen as physical abuse, but A Girl Like Her shows that words are just as powerful. Talk about the different ways that people can bully others; what has the most lasting impact?

2. Talk about teen suicide. This is an incredibly tough topic, but one that needs to be addressed. What makes some teens think that it's their only option? What impact does their decision have on their friends and family? Where can kids in despair turn for assistance?

3. How do the characters in A Girl Like Her demonstrate compassion and empathy? Why are these important character strengths?

4. In one scene, a father shows compassion for the actual bullies, who often need as much help as those being bullied. How does this movie portray the bully? Why do you think she bullied her former friend?

5. Brian is stuck between wanting to keep his promise to Jessica and needing to tell others about her situation. Do you think it would have made him a bad friend to tell others before things went so far? What's the message here for teens who have friends suffering from bullying?

That’s it for Day 7! See you tomorrow!