Overcoming the Bystander's Dilemma
Sometimes, we see or suspect that bullying or abuse is happening. It might be children on the playground, or it could be adults at work. When we’re bystanders (people who watch something happen) we have to decide what to do. Should we step in, even if it feels scary, or should we hope someone else will do something?
WHY IT’S IMPORTANT TO ACT
At the center of this dilemma is a big question: What should we do when someone is being hurt? We’re all part of a community, which means we have a responsibility to help each other. There's a famous quote that says, “The only thing needed for evil to win is for good people to do nothing.” This means that by not doing anything, we’re actually helping the problem to grow.
When we see someone getting hurt, what we do or don’t do can make a great difference, not only for the person being harmed but also for everyone else who witnesses it. By stepping in, we’re showing that hurting others is wrong. But if we ignore it, we allow the person causing harm to continue, which could lead to even more trouble.
Although it only takes one person to make an impact, the second person to act is often the most crucial in creating a chain reaction. Studies in social psychology suggest that when one person intervenes, they can "break the ice," and once a second person joins, it signals to others that helping is acceptable and encouraged. This insight is related to the concept of social proof, where people tend to follow the actions of others, especially in uncertain situations.
FIGHTING AGAINST THE “BYSTANDER EFFECT”
The “bystander effect” happens when people think someone else will help, so they do nothing. The more people watching, the less likely anyone is to step in. Overcoming this means choosing to take action, even if we feel nervous.
Sometimes, people are afraid to get involved because they think they might get hurt, too, or because they feel like it’s not their place. But helping doesn’t always mean jumping in. It could be as simple as telling a trusted adult, quietly supporting the person who was hurt, or reporting abuse after you witness the harm.
Keeping people safe isn’t just the job of teachers, police officers, parents, or even mandatory reporters. It’s something we all need to do. By caring about others, we help create a world where bullying and abuse aren’t tolerated. Learning about how to recognize bullying and abuse helps us know when to step in. It also helps us feel more confident about what to do when we see these things happen.
TAKE ACTION
To really make a difference, we have to be ready to take action. One way to do this is by learning more. Juliette’s House offers training programs for all ages that teach us how to safely handle situations involving harassment and abuse. These programs give us resources and tips for helping others.
Join us and make a positive impact! Sign up for a prevention education training at JH and help build a safer, kinder community.